I have lived my life confined. I see my world spread out
before me, asking to be explored and begging to be noticed,
and I want more than anything to listen to its siren song,
to breathe its clean, filling air and bask in the feeling
of its revitalizing sunlight. but there are cell bars in my way.
they are cold and metallic and cruel and absolute,
and I have no way of getting past. I can reach out in front of me freely,
but my mind and my aspirations are locked in.
I want to seize the day, live my life to the fullest; I want to embody every
one of those cliches imaginable, but I can’t, because I’m stuck
with my cellmates, fear and regret, in a encapsulating prison cell called anxiety.
I feel its tendrils gripping me all the time, holding me back from what I could be.
sometimes it feels like I’m going to collapse in on myself, an isolated implosion.
but lately, something seems different. I am not defenseless.
I’ve learned its tricks and methods of manipulation and I know now
how to use its weaknesses to overcome it.
I can duck its blows, block its punches, and stop its attacks.
I am the dark horse, the David to its Goliath,
but I am stronger than it believes me to be.
June 14, 2017