Letter to Coach

May 30, 2017
By Anonymous

With you I can’t do anything right.
I work tirelessly to prove myself
but it will never be enough.
Your evil breath shoots out
Words of hate causing me to lose
my focus. My passion. My motivation.
It all crumbles under your control.

Day after day I go through the motions
For it is not the same as it used to be.
What once was a safe outlet,
What once brought me joy
Has morphed into perilous labor
that tears at my mind and body:
Your hateful words stick to my mind
Like the bandages that cling to my knee,
At least these bandages help my pain,
Unlike your words.

But at the end of the day-
despite the destruction
that you have caused-
it is you that I pity.
Your thirst for power,
for control has overtaken you.
You feed off of pain and self doubt
You get joy out of my tears
You laugh at my hardships
Only to feed the gaping hole in your life.

What should be filled with love and happiness
Is now overflowing with hate and bitterness.
It consumes you more and more everyday,
It will keep going, reaching further
and further beyond repair
until you have nothing
and no one

I want to thank you.
Thank you for showing me
the person I do not want to become,
The wicked, vicious, bitter person you are.
For showing me the path I do not want to go down;
A path of regret leading towards the point of no return.
For showing me the life that I do not want to live.
A life where demeaning others is the only way to feel happy.

Because of you
I will never be that person.
I will never go down that path.
I will never live that life.

Thank you.

The author's comments:

This piece is a message to one of my coaches and includes all of my anger and frustration with her. 

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