i dreamt about you last night 

it wasn't my normal rosy dream

which left me nauseous when i wake up

because i remember you don't love me anymore

it was a yellow dream

a bright

electric

yellow

dream

it sent volts into my bones and awakened my soul

it inspired me to write so write i will

i'm not going to say thank you for leaving

that my grades improved 

my friendships grew stronger

or i had more time to focus on me 

because i miss you

and i was happier when i was sleep deprived 

from staying up all night texting you

you were my best friend

my muse

my inspiration

and my creative spark

you awakened the poet in me

my first love 

i still hope you will come back

that you'll realize you miss me too 

muscles tear before they grow stronger 

i hope that in loving and losing you

i can become a better me