How to fail any class you take

April 18, 2017
By jputs GOLD, Sussex, Wisconsin
jputs GOLD, Sussex, Wisconsin
10 articles 0 photos 0 comments

-A mountain of laziness
-A flurry of friends who don’t like school either
-A vast addiction to your phone
-A streak of things to do
-A dap of sleepless nights
-A droplet of lies
-A pocketful ability to sleep wherever you are
-A crater sized spot in your future



1. First, take a class that will challenge your intellectual ability.

2. Secondly, put your book for that class in a cabinet or closet that you won’t look in for the remainder of the semester.

3. Next you will need a friend to send you pictures of the homework you are suppose to do. (make sure you write word for word what your friend did so it is obvious you didn’t do it yourself and you can get major points off for cheating)

4. Then, make sure to never request off work or have someone take your shift for work, you need the money to buy cool things.

5. After this, when you are informed of a test or quiz get together with some friends and tell your parents you are going to study and then game for hours on end so you don’t worry about said test or quiz.

6. After you fail to study DO NOT forget to have your phone out during the test so you can get a 0 for cheating. (preferably sit in the front of the class and have your phone on your desk so the teacher knows you really are cheating.)

7. This is followed by a solid nap in class when the teacher is talking; it’s not like they say anything meaningful anyway.

8. To top everything off do not show up to your final, this ensures that you will lose at least 15% of your grade in the class making it even easier for you to fail this class.

9. If you follow these instructions you will have a beautiful F on your report card and transcript for the rest of your life!

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