There is a huge difference between "I'm fine" and "I'm happy". That thin line you want so bad to reach, but are always to "fine" to reach it. It's never easy to feel happy or good. The only happiness you get is when they are here for you helping you get through it. But one day their all gone not one remains to help you. Living alone trying to pick up every piece of hope you have left just to keep your self together. Never really understanding why they left to begin with, but then you remember, they left because of you. You caused them to always feel down or depressed and they didn't want to stick around to help you. You are the reason your alone right now with no one by your side. you are the reason not even yourself loves you. Everything disappearing slowly, yet it seems so fast.one day friends, next day none. One day sunshine,next day darkness. One day life, next day death. It's right around the corner just waiting for you to reach for it. Sticking out your hand inches away from it. Finally reaching the edge and it slowly takes away your body. Every day you spent trying to pick up the pieces all blown away cause you didn't love yourself enough to pick up that last piece of hope.
April 16, 2017