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I am strong

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I want to tell you a story,
A story that made my vision clean
A story that made me...me

I am weak…
I come home with creaking limbs
My bag feels like as if I have the entire world on my shoulders
My skin feels like the Sahara
And my hair like rubber

I am weak...
I have my head up, but I don't have my hopes high
I walk into that room
And there are tears in my eyes and I say to myself
Why? why?

I am weak
I imagine how powerful those horses are
As they stand anxiously in those gates
It's like how I feel
But I don't like it one bit.

I am weak
I bite my cheek and it tastes like metal
I pretend I’m the horse
And my anxiety is the jockey
He kicks at my sides and it hurts.

I am weak
The sandpaper like surface cuts my skin
As my body slaps the water gently
With my blinders on and my heart in my throat
I almost forget that I have to breathe.

I am weak
I’m trying...I’m trying so hard!
I toss my blinders and I choke on sobs and water
My shaky limbs can barely support my crumbling self
Why?! WHY?!

I am weak
They tell me that I’m not good
That my time was pathetic
I'm so weak from being weak that I now wear it as my aesthetic
And I don't understand it.

I’m weak
I’m pushing myself so hard that it hurts
And they don't seem to notice nor care
Because all they do is judge you and stare

I’m weak
My brand on my back
With a safety pinned heart
Lyrics running down my back
Looking like as if they bled from my heart

My last day of being weak was left in the waters
I drowned that voice out
So It couldn't haunt me any longer
I've learned a lot during those dreadful and painful days
But I still hated it in so many many ways

I’m weak
I don't say a word
No one notices the “walk on”
I've never done this before
But mom says it's in my blood

 

I'm strong
Running in one-hundred-degree heat
My feet pounding on the pavement
To a steady beat
They don't understand my music or how I like to pace
But all I know is that this is a steady race

I'm strong
They put me in the back of the boat
They think my muscle is just fat
Oh boy they didn't see it coming...
When I pulled 500 meters two minutes FLAT

I'm strong
They like to pick on me
Call me crude names
Talk behind my back
But mom says just play the game your way

I am strong
If the coach tells you to run: You sprint
If the coach tells you to Row in the rain: you row in a storm
And if no one listens then get out of here
This sport isn't a game this like a battlefield

I'm strong
I take my pain and I ignite it like a book doused in gasoline
I tell my peers to insult me
Because every negative word will ignite a fire
And it will be worth it to me when I’m lying on the floor

I am strong
Because I did my best and I pushed the limits even more
They said I can't do it
Well ok then
Ill prove you wrong when you see gold around my neck

I am strong
I am like a soldier in battle
Tell me what to do and I’ll do it
If not, I’ll do it one thousand times better!
And I’ll prove it to you with the gauze around my hands

I am strong
And if you believe this is little league then you're wrong
This sport isn't like any high school game at all
This is war, on the river
If you got the right weapons

I am strong
Everything falls quiet, except the ringing in my ears
A single ripple will ruin the peace
A bird chirps in the summer afternoon...what could possibly ruin the mood?
…...ATTENTION…. ROW!
 






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