Smile

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I was once called the girl of sunshine
I was once known for my smile
I was once loved for always being happy
I was once admired for my hard work

 

But then I stopped smiling
I stopped smiling and stopped lying

 

I no longer pretended to sleep well at night
I no longer hid my loneliness
I no longer covered my melancholy

 

Because I was tired
I was tired of making people smile
When I was all but somber

And when everyone asked, “Why do you no longer smile?”
I made up excuses
I made up lies
And I got tired yet again

 

But I as time continued onward
I realized that I did not smile
To make people happy
But rather
To make sure I don’t face the truth

 

I smile because it is easier
Than facing sorrows and angers
I smile because it is easier
Than shedding more tears
I smile because it is easier
To fight battles within me
Than fight them outside

 

But I become exhausted
I tire of trying to be happy
I tire of worrying for other people’s smiles
I tire of pretending to be joyous
But mostly,
I tire of being afraid of my sadness

 

So I think…
I think that from now on
When somebody says, “Smile!”
I think that I will just smile.






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