The Death of a Songbird

March 30, 2017
By MagdaEmilia GOLD, Big Creek, California
MagdaEmilia GOLD, Big Creek, California
11 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Suess


If hope is the thing with feathers
Then my heart is a desolate cage

Devoid

Of everything
But for a pile of deceased birds
Left unfed....
left for dead.

Nothing perches on the branches of my soul
Besides the ravens,
Plucking pretty pigeons clean.

Even if love could save me
It seems love is allergic to the
Downy deceased resting between my ribs.



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This article has 3 comments.


on Apr. 30 2017 at 3:27 pm
MagdaEmilia GOLD, Big Creek, California
11 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Suess

thank you guys so much, and I really appreciate the pointers, it helps a lot. :)

kissthemoon said...
on Apr. 21 2017 at 2:02 pm
kissthemoon, Miami Beach, Florida
0 articles 2 photos 46 comments
wow! like SoW wrote, the imagery is AMAZING! wow! youve got talent

on Apr. 20 2017 at 6:14 pm
WolfWhisperer0911 PLATINUM, Crosby, Texas
46 articles 0 photos 777 comments

Favorite Quote:
"For I command you, be brave and steadfast! For the Lord your God will be with you whenever you go."
-Joshua 1:9

"Throw me to the wolves, and I'll return leading the pack."- Unknown

"Never moon a werewolf." -Mike Binder

@MagdaEmilia I must say, WOW. I really like how you use the imagery. I would like if you could use a little bit more explanation, but it was concise and sweet to me. I would like to see more of the poem in maybe a few more paragraphs. I would have the word "Devoid" near the previous line and try to use a little bit more figurative language to make the the story interesting. I will say that if the poem is about you/ I, I would recommend that you use the similes about the person. Such as "I am nothing but a pile for the deceased birds..." But I will say good job and keep writing!


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