To Compare to You

February 17, 2017
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Awkward, Afraid, Humiliated,
Amazing, Courteous, Charming,


To compare to you is impossible.
Try I may, try I might,
to make you jealous
to impress upon you.
Only fools covet my efforts as
your standpoint is secret to me,
as your eyes flee from mine,
another mystery.


Swagger in vain, for nothing affects,
as your requite sits unidentified.
My muscles strain and lungs burn--though
I cannot relax--
though I continue for you.


I tug on my flaws and draw them from your view.
I want you to look and see,
Look into my being,
see what I hand you with a bashful smile.
Look at my face,
and see the patent roses of my heart.
Look at what I think is vile,
but only see my passion.
Look at my clear humiliation,
and pray you see my humble shame.


Insecurity suffuses me when our gaze connects,
when I open myself onto
without second thought.
When I remember in dismay my silly actions.
When I vaunt of others--forgive me.
When I realize I cannot compare to you.


Amazing, Courteous, Charming,
Awkward, Afraid, Humiliated,
This is Me.

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