February 20, 2017

i’m desperate for a grasp
on reality.
I repress my stress and allow anxiety access to my heart, mind, and soul
anxiety is haunting on the weary heart of a Christ follower
failure, crowds, attention, measuring up, judgment
i’m desperate for solid ground
while drowning.
I’m a lifeguard I can save myself I’m a swimmer for God’s sake
but I’m weak from fights I don’t even realize are ongoing
depression, eating disorders, urges to self-harm
i’m desperate for a light
in my cage.
I am strapped down and force fed
society’s ideal image, ideal life, ideal everything
A’s, ivy colleges, bikini bodies, hot boyfriends, happiness –at all times—
i’m desperate for an outlet
as my heart breaks.
For third world countries, those in need, and those forgotten
spreading myself thinner than paper
school, sports, volunteering, work, church, sleep
i’m desperate for a savior
of omnipotence.
Covered in darkness, never seeing the light, never stepping back to see
the bigger picture of all that God is and what he does
At His mightiness, His peace, His forgiveness, His strength, His power, His majesty

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