But no

February 18, 2017
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My heart,
is shattered once again.
My hands still bleeding,
from my last effort,
to put it back together again.
Even with all the glue and tape.
It still isn’t the same.
The image it’s giving me is,
warped and cracked.
Missing small pieces.

I wish someone was here to help.
Angel. My grandma.
Her belief that good food and soap,
can fix all.
But no, she’s past.
Mickey. My brother.
His tough love,
comforting me.
But no, he has a job.
Kamal. My brother.
His midnight ice cream cones and long drives,
distracting me.
But no, he’s in college.
Nate. My brother.
His nonsensical arguments,
making me forget.
But no, he has his own problems now.
Daniel dad. My step-dad.
His western movies and knife lessons,
intriguing me.
But no, he isn’t here.
Most of all,
Eating my burnt chicken like a $100 meal.
Looking at my kindergarten picture of her like the Mona Lisa.
Calling me beautiful when I have convince myself I’m not.
But no, she isn’t here either.

So I sit here alone.
With my bleeding hands and puffy red eyes.
Putting back together,
my shattered heart.

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