November 16, 2016

Dear 7th grade me.
I know how dark and depressing everyone is that surrounds you.
I know you dread attending that creepy middle school with the old bricks and pale walls that are chipping away.
Guess what?
That boy you've had a crush on since a year ago actually will talk to you.
That boy becomes your best friend.
He will make you feel different in many ways.
Go with your gut,
The  two girls who commit suicide won’t be the end of the depressing events that happen but it will be over soon.
Everything will be okay, I promise.

Dear 10th grade me.
Trust me, you're not big and bad because you completed freshman year.
In fact, Junior year is coming to body slam you right in the head.
Junior year will only feel like the first of the multiple concussions.
Be courteous to some of the life changing events that are about to happen.
I hope you are ready to say goodbye to your home, great grandma, your relationship, and your dog.
It is about 5 kleenex boxes bad.
You witness great grandma’s life evaporate right in front of you and Collin.
And you will watch the doctors tell your parents, that Jessie’s life is getting shorter.
This year will be the worst one yet.
Everything will be okay. I promise.

Dear present me.
The past is the past.
Use it to your advantage.
This is who you are.
I don’t know who you are going to be but I know who you were.
I want you to know one thing.
Everything will be okay. I promise.


Because why not
I want to talk about being yourself.
Being real, true, and brave.
I want to talk about how fear is a pile of massive rocks set on teenager’s unstable confidence.
I want to talk about expressing what we wear, think, and believe.
Expressing who we want to be even if people shoot looks of disbelief.
I want to talk about how it’s okay to dance and jam to new, bizarre types of music.
To be able to FORGET about the judgmental group of kids who will give you the “What  are you wearing, freak”, look that makes heat rise to your cheeks and sweat leak out of your palms.
Forget them.
I want to talk about walking in school, the park, the store, work, or anywhere
WITH confidence.
Shoulders back, chin higher than the eiffel tower.
Looking life directly in the eyes and feeling unstoppable.
I want to talk about feeling good in your own skin.
Either it be brown, black, white, yellow
Bruised, dry, covered in acne
soft, fresh, old, or newly bold.
I want to talk about letting go of being insecure about what people might be thinking because
Why do we care?
I want to talk about change.
Changing when we want to.
Not changing when you don’t.
Being us.
Creating ourselves for the better.
Allowing yourself  to realize what matters.
I want to talk about being who I am and feeling proud of that.
I know who I am.
But tell me, who are you?

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