It's crazy how I'm old enough to make my own decisions

But yet their still made for me,
I get punished for the little mistakes I create and you
Only make them worse,
Our relationship is not where it needs to be you call me
Out of my name and think it's okay.

I leave for 2 days just to get away from it all but I
Can never catch a break,
Telling me to get on my knees to scrub this and that
Slowly I'm feeling the depression,
I never tell you because you think I'm just in this
Phase but in reality,
You cause it all to the point I just want to drop and fall,

I clean it all and cook it all but it never gets recognized does it,
Times where you call me dumb , retarded , and did you forget
A bastard included,
I try to gather all my energy and emotions to form a smile but,
Once done I look in the mirror and tears fall down,
I have to fake it around you but we still come across problems,
That are created from little things I take it in,

And release it when you're gone, I force all the tears out
Until I can't anymore , until my eyes are red as blood
I cry until eventually I'm gasping for air ...
Why? Because It's my go to and you never cared
So to me nothing else matters,

I do as I'm told but still feeling captive
Didn't allow me to go out for 8 months why?
Because you just never trusted me to do so
Once I messed up its the end of the world,
And one day I will escape.