July 30, 2016
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My thoughts are too loud for this quiet town
These boots too stiff for these roads
Every step feels heavier than the last

My legs drag me towards the beach
Moving carefully, as if on ice
The same way i think or speak
Never both at the same time

My boots sink into the sand
It becomes hard to walk now
It feels although I’m running through water again
But I don’t make it quite as far this time

I feel myself turn cold, numb with frostbite
But my thoughts are alive, warm and uninhibited

Sand climbs up my knees
Filling my boots, crawling over my hipbones
I’m turning into stone
Frozen in thought

Like a terrible superhero movie
Where everyone’s waiting for me to save myself
Everyone is expectant of me
To do anything
To Do anything but nothing

But my mind clouds and my eyes glaze over
I’m staring into the open sea
Shackled to the sand
And I imagine this is what a wax figure would feel like

This is the first time in months I’ve left the house
And i don’t know what to do
But stand by the pier
Gripped by the thought of nothing
Maybe it’s the thought of too much freedom

The water can’t dissolve this type of sand
The sand coffins me, roots me to the spot
But my mind moves still, like a raven over dark choppy waters

I move my eyes all around me
Statues of wanderers erect, motionless on the ground
Looking out into the bleak sky, lost in their minds
Crystallized by sand
Mouths hung open
As if halfway through a sentence

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