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Atropos' Witness

He saw the string edge backwards,

arrow thread across the sky

Time seemed to slow

He seemed to know

its quiver in his heart was...

He was skewered with wide eyes.

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MissMimi said...
today at 10:17 am
I forgot to mention that your title is perfection!
ayam_maya replied...
today at 9:32 pm
Thank you so much! It's good to have feedback, I really appreciate it. Can't wait to read more of your work as well! Happy writing, Maya
MissMimi said...
today at 10:16 am
Wow! I love how, in so few words, you address the powerful theme of fate. The careful choice of diction (i.e. "Arrow thread") cultivates poignant imagery while simultaneously prompting readers to connect the poem to mythology, and as a result, to the question being posed. I especially love the ellipses after "it's quiver in his heart was". Beautiful use of literary device throughout, beautiful writing all around. You truly have a poet's intentional, yet lyrical voice. I look forward to reading m... (more »)
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