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What do I do when all I can think of is my heart breaking

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What do I do when all I can think of is my heart breaking,
Sobbing in the shower
Trying only to do what was best for you?

What do I do when all I can feel is that resentment,
Because you gave me hope
And ended it after I let out the breath I’d been holding?

What do I do when I am constantly flashing back,
To the confusion and hurt
When you didn’t tell me you loved me too?

What do I do when every thought I have slips away,
In a puff of smoke
Because I can’t f***ing concentrate on anything?

How do I fix it -
The resentment and hurt and anger
Without holding it over your head?

I don’t want you to know these things.
I don’t want you to feel what I feel.
I don’t want you to be sorry anymore.

I know you’re sorry.
I know how badly you feel.
I don’t want to dredge up what’s better left buried.

Emotions are hard.
I’ve never liked them.
What do I do?




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