What do I do when all I can think of is my heart breaking,
Sobbing in the shower
Trying only to do what was best for you?
What do I do when all I can feel is that resentment,
Because you gave me hope
And ended it after I let out the breath I’d been holding?
What do I do when I am constantly flashing back,
To the confusion and hurt
When you didn’t tell me you loved me too?
What do I do when every thought I have slips away,
In a puff of smoke
Because I can’t f***ing concentrate on anything?
How do I fix it -
The resentment and hurt and anger
Without holding it over your head?
I don’t want you to know these things.
I don’t want you to feel what I feel.
I don’t want you to be sorry anymore.
I know you’re sorry.
I know how badly you feel.
I don’t want to dredge up what’s better left buried.
Emotions are hard.
I’ve never liked them.
What do I do?