Some days you’ll be driving home and the sky will somehow sympathize with your tears. They’ll manifest on your windshield faster than you expected.You won’t have the energy nor the will to flick the switch and have them wiped away. You’ll let it blur the road before you, blur the stop sign you’ll end up running, blurring everything you thought you knew. Wipe the shield. Being blind to the path before you is never a good thing.
Timing is a b**** and people give you so much to remember after they leave you. Don’t be afraid to drown in every kiss, every whispered word. Remember. No one can take your memories away from you.
It’ll be a month from the day they said this was for the best and you’ll slowly let it drift from your mind. You won’t think about him while you’re driving in the morning or painting your nails in the afternoon. But then you’ll head to the park he always took you to and suddenly nothing will be okay. Don’t lie to yourself. A month can never erase the feeling of his fingers burning through your bare thigh.
You loved him. You did and no one can change that. This wasn’t a young romance, this wasn’t foolish, this wasn’t reckless. Your feelings are valid. He loved you. Or maybe he didn’t, but you found the strength to surrender your every inch to a boy who hung on to your every word like you spoke the secrets of the universe.
When opening your eyes feels like a chore, when you feel like you’re being crushed under the memory of him, remember that he once made you feel like more than just pieces. You felt whole. Someday you’ll feel like that again.
You’ll never forget him. But you’ll forgive him.
You’ll never love someone just the way you loved him.
But that’s what is so remarkable about loving someone with every part of your being.
Each person is different.
And maybe next time you won’t love the way this new boy walks with his hands in his pockets
But instead you’ll fall for the freckle on his ear and the dimple on his left cheek.
Each person is to be loved differently.
Even you.
Especially you.
Don’t expect to find another just like him.
You’ll be left more broken than where you started.