you impalpable fish,

stareing from prismed submarine glass,
asphyxiate me
in oxygen poisoned hypnosis. asphyxiate me
in curiosity, you impalpable fish, you

spiny skinned tuna. you seem
multidimensional
in this mass of synthetic pixelation. seem
extra-
terrestrial in this plastic fish-bowled asylum, you
impalpable fish, you 
kaleidoscopic enigma. i
fell in love
with the way your scales hugged the moonlight:

with the naked asexuality of it all. do you remember
the naked asexuality of it all? the sea
that scoured our naked flesh of our
chameleoned husks and our
inhibitions? the
blue-bottomed girls and the green-lipped boys and
you and i
sipping salt from the air,
re-lighting asthmatic lips with the
lunar eclipse,
bellies swelling swollen with smoke and 

juvenile delinquency?
the orbic flex of the ocean
coaxed me into moon-beam sonata.
moonlit insecurities
evaporated. mediocrity
evaporated. you

hypnotized me
with your sphinx-eyed stare as you
whispered sonar secrets to the moon and i
lipread the nebulic language, but
couldn’t seem to understand:
liquid Orion’s belt
throbbed in your iris. i understand: you’ll never love me
the way you love the moon.

do you remember
the ocean? the
naked asexuality of it all
bathing in the limelight?
our hands carving the sand into a mermaid with
dreamed muscle memory precision?
you said she looked just like me as you
shaped her left breast with fractured shell and specks of constellation.

you could see straight through me even then:

i feel like faintly stenciled sand,
parenthesized and echoing and
defenseless
from your breath.

i can feel my soul
spilling into the ocean and i’m
kissing away pieces of myself
for your little fish lips to gulp up
in between breaths of salt-water.

you were my sun, you impalpable fish,
but retrospect breeds palpability:

the sun is merely the closest star
in a galaxy of carbon-copied cosmos.
a million fish in the sea,

right? all i see is water.

the tide’s getting higher.