Everything happened so quickly, I was young and in love. He was older than me, I felt so mature. He gave me everything a little girl wanted, someone to love and someone that makes me feel like the only person in the world. I never thought it would end the way it did. He was my best friend, my everything. It started out as a fairy tale, he was my prince charming. All my dreams were coming true, yet I was blinded to see the signs. It started out with jealously, one by one he picked out friends he wanted gone. Then came obsession, everything I did he had to know about. Month after month he got worst, there were rules upon rules. I was abused mentally and emotionally. A year later, I became a high schooler, thats when everything changed. I began to see what was really happing, we started to fall apart. I became depressed and alone, he became heartless. People started to see the abuse, I began to cut. Deeper and deeper, I was hooked. Every cut let out a scream for help, he became more angry. Night after night of crying and wishing I was dead, I finally decided there was no end. I took my arm and began to draw, the rust made it harder. Deeper and deeper, I felt free. The red started to flow, the words die in my arm. The stinging of the razor blade disappeared. I found myself lying in an ambulance, questions upon questions. I was brought to a hospital. A week later I was home, he didn't even care. People started to see it was his fault and told me to leave, I had no choice. I sent him the final goodbye, he was upset. I went back to school, everyone knew what had happened. He began to walk towards me, he wanted to talk. My phone went off, so did he. He took it and threw it, he saw I was talking to another guy. Day after day I felt scared and hopeless, I needed him back. I would do anything for his attention, he was my drug. He knew how to get in my head, he played his games. Using me when no one else wanted him, he was in control. He started to do drugs, I was abused physically. Hit after hit, I began to lose hope. One after another, I lost control. I told him I was done and whatever we had was over, I lied. He told me he never cared, I fell apart. It started with a hand full, then another. Forty-eight pills later, I was dying slowly. Another week later I was back to school, all my friends were gone. Him, his new girlfriend and my so called friends vandalized the schools dug out, it was all about me. Day after day something new happened, he was a monster. We were broken up, but I never felt that way. He began to follow me everywhere I went, I had no where to hide. I stopped going to school, but nothing would end. I was in hell, but I still loved him. During the day he was my worst nightmare, at night he was prince charming. There is two sides of every story, there was two sides of him. I kept falling for it every night, he wanted me. He would use his charming words, but once he got what he wanted he was gone. I finally started to date again, he didn't like that. He would harass every guy I dated telling them I was his, I couldn't be happy. I acted like I was over him, I wasn't. I started to do drugs, it worked. All my pain was gone, I was hooked. Bowl after bowl, I started to make new friends. I hated myself, this isn't who I am. He found every weakness I had, I couldn't take it anymore. Enough was enough, I asked for a restraining order. A few weeks later I was getting ready for court, I was scared. I walked into the room, he smiled at me. I wasn't ready to tell the world what he put me threw, I started to cry. He began to laugh, then a rage filled my body. We were first, I gave the judge the paper stating what he had done to me. I was ready for him to go down, I got my request. It stopped everyone but him, I was giving up. I changed my number, my classes and my bus, but no matter what he was there. I finally found hope and everything changed, he was expelled. One year later he wanted to talk, so I let him. He said he changed, I know he didn't. One word after another, I felt my heart aching. He wanted to see me, I was nervous. We met in the woods, alone. We talked about life, I felt better. Then he began to beg, he wanted me. I did what he wanted, it felt so wrong. That night I never heard from him again, I was broken. Another year later I found myself, happy as I could be. Never heard from him, he was gone for good, I thought. A few months went by, I started feeling different. One night I couldn't seem to sleep, it was midnight. My phone went off, who could it be? He sent me a message, are you still alive? My emotions went crazy, I didn't know what to do. A few hours later I wrote back, yes. It started as a real conversation, I didn't let my guard down. He asked if we could see each other, I got scared. Knowing the only person I could trust would get mad, I kept my feelings in. That morning I felt so guilty, I couldn't keep it from him. I explained what had happened, he was calm about it. That day taught me I'm not alone and I don't have to face it by myself. He gave me all the hope I needed and stood up for me, I was blessed. I never thought my dreams would fall when I was young, but today it's made me a stronger person. Day after day I hurt myself for someone who didn't deserve me, I'm better than that. I have hopes and dreams, he will never get to me. I hurt and punished myself, it's not okay. Life is to precious to let someone take control and make you someone your not. I'm stronger than ever now, never again will I be the victim of abuse.