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Our Dream

March 11, 2014
By Cheerismylife029 BRONZE, Derry, New Hampshire
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Cheerismylife029 BRONZE, Derry, New Hampshire
3 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
my tears are for tomorrow but came yesterday

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The crowd roaring
Our hearts pounding
Our hard work has payed off
The teams waiting for a trophy
To only win first
Is a dream
Hard to reach
Not impossible
But we made it
That`s why were winners
We put our hands on the mat
White sneakers
Hair up
Performing
The light beating on us
And were out of
Breath
Then we bare those
last two counts
and smile

© Christopher A., Phoenix, AZ

The author's comments:
What inspired this piece was that I do a lot of cheering and I was thinking about our competions and it started going off in my head
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 2 comments.

currently_liddell GOLD said...
on May. 30 2014 at 2:53 pm
currently_liddell GOLD, Derry, New Hampshire
18 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

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"To only win first Is a dream" Is awkwardly phrased, maybe a little editing would work. Also a lot of lines are really short and seem like incomplete thoughts.
colorguardgrl ELITE said...
on May. 30 2014 at 2:51 pm
colorguardgrl ELITE, Derry, New Hampshire
111 articles 10 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?” - Mad Hatter

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You might benifit from multipul stanzas also some of your lines are a little short and don't make a lot of sense.