I see life
Happiness
With no sadness in sight of others
I paste on a fake smile in moments
But, it can’t be real
Life is all smiles
Laughs and giggles with friends
Home is not reality
Home is only where sadness exists
Only in my mind

I see mother screaming
Eyes blazing
Accusing me of wrong I never committed
Voice bouncing off the wall
Scaring me
I convince myself it isn’t reality
Or maybe
I am just not good enough
No I am fine
Mother says I just need to lose weight
And clear up my skin
Then reality will come back
Happiness will flow abundantly
But tell no one
They must not know
That sadness has invaded me
Shush keep it locked away
And paint a smile
That is reality