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what i should have left unsaid

I am friend to the shadow realm
we silently agreed to abandon
three months ago.

The forbidden thoughts
slumber in the dark, dusty
confines of my vanishing heart.

each emotion is a twisted clone
of my own emaciated figure.

they moan and writhe
beneath asphyxiating quilts
of broken memories reflected
upon shards of dark glass.

these thoughts are nocturnal creatures
destined to awaken slowly with the
dusky light of the ebony moon.

they claw out from the hollow caverns
deep within my fractured soul
and advance up the mountain under which
I have buried the conflict that brews within.

The gaunt creatures avoid the avalanche
of self encouragement I shove over the precipice
and stumble so blearily across
the fragile surface of my mind

at the ashen peak,
their soft distorted cries
gradually blossom as a blood red rose
from the ring of haziness
with rising intensity until it bubbles
from my own trembling mouth
as a shrill scream into the infinite blackness
fading from a feral howl to
a whimper of brooding pain

the truth haloing above my head like
a hundred million lost galaxies far and
just beyond my reach

yet the aching
of my entire being
is but a crack upon my blank façade.

I allow my dark curtain of hair to fall over my face
(scarred by the accumulation of acid tears)
(siphoned forth from the cruel stabbing of heartbreak)
all in the simplicity of you passing by
quietly acknowledging my presence
with a warm smile and softly spoken words
set aside for the unaware

but if you looked closely,
you could identify the nearly invisible
forcefield that resonates from his
slightly quivering body.
Flushed skin.
Clenched hands.
Tightening jaw.

and I know that our thoughts align
and similar memories arise
as a cloud of steam from a lone geyser
on some distant planet.

blissful sensations…
a rough hand grazing my soft palm.
my eyes reflected back into yours
a hundred thousand times.
the bittersweet scent of breath.
the quickening of hearts.

the helpless desires of a child
secretly in love.

and we are the sun and moon
on the night of a rare eclipse



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