I remember how,
On a summer evening scented with the traces of sunlight
And flushed with the warmth of the glowing fields of flowers,
You held out your hand and invited me
into your boat.
It'll be fun you said.
It's perfectly safe you said.
Skin grazed against skin as I took your hand and jumped
Lightly into the boat. Thin summer dress brushed against cool jacket
As the ropes tying boat to shore were thrown away,
And our bodies knotted together and were borne away.
The powerful stroke of your oars lurched
me toward you:
I would not have thrown myself to you
of my own will;
Smiling as if you knew this would happen, you locked your arms around me
And held me in your embrace, tightly.

But when the tides grew rough and fast
as night approached,
As the teardrop pinpricks of the stars struck holes above us,
As pools of oozing ink replaced blue sky,
Your eyes grew wide with panic, and
your arms withdrew from me,
Gripping tightly to your oars, you began beating your way back to shore,
Senselessly, not knowing exactly what
you were doing
Where you were heading
Who you even were.
I thought you knew what you were doing,
I cried.
But you were no longer listening to me; your oar, in roaring up,
Struck the side of my face and sent me
hurling out of the boat.

I thought you said I'd be safe, I cried,
I never said that, you replied.
Help me, I begged, reaching out to hold your hand,
But you only rowed further and further
away from me,
Your oar rammed against my face and
left me bloody,
Blinded, struggling to breathe through
my tears,
Leaving me to scream and gulp in
huge mouthfuls
Of brackish, briny black water
Screaming only one word:
Your name,
Over and over again,
Until I sank down like a stone to the
miry depths
And drowned in my cries for you,
Oh my love,
My love.

From,
The Girl You Left Breathless
On the bottom of your world.

p.s.
wish you were here.