I smile and play with my hair when I don’t know what to say
By that point I just get the opportunity to smile and look away
As in my head I think of a million things I could have said
But it doesn't matter, the conversation is now dead
And now the next few days I see you will be hell for me
As I think of the things I could have done for you to see
For you to see, that I, I really do like you
But speaking up is not something I can do
I honestly have tried about a million times
But every time I mess up and end up writing these rhymes
Because this keyboard helps me communicate things I cannot say
So I type it all to myself and lock it all away
I have habits of pacing and not making eye contact
Hiding the really me, not sure how you expect me to act
This screen is the message in the bottle to me
Hardly anyone will read what I feel, but I still feel free
And yet everyone says poetry is lame
So I sometimes don’t even sign my real name
So I guess one day I will work up the courage to talk to you
But right now I don’t think that is something I can do
I have habits of being confident for small amounts of time
Then after a while I become self-aware and loose the shine
It’s hard to forget how many times I could have spoken
But I always forget and move on no matter how broken