Olive: An Inventory of Being | Teen Ink

Olive: An Inventory of Being

January 26, 2014
By blueolive GOLD, Bowmanville, Other
blueolive GOLD, Bowmanville, Other
13 articles 2 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You cant go looking for love, you have to let love find you".


I am Olivia,
Known by others as Olive.

I am sixteen years old.

I am an artist, a fashionista, and a young lady;
Maturing each and every year.

I paint.
I laugh.
I smoke.
I take pictures.
I set trends.
I take my cats for walks.

I’ve lived away from my family,
And that is when I learned independence.

I smile.
I write.
I game.
I bake cheesecakes.
I text.
I set goals.

I suffer from high anxiety,
And that is when I noticed that I strive for routine.

I sleep.
I cry.
I drink blueberry tea.
I dye my hair.
I watch Breaking Bad.
I shave my legs.

I was a follower,
And that is when I realized I have my own voice.

I walk.
I sneeze loudly.
I go to school.
I observe.
I wear lipstick.
I eat bacon with peanut butter.

I’ve been fighting a battle against my depression,
And that is when I discovered that life isn’t so bad.

I paint my nails.
I write stories in my head.
I dream.
I sing in the shower.
I glam up.
I eat candy.

I was a liar,
And that is when I found the honesty.

My cats are my life.
Marley.
Kernel.
Little Girl.

My cats are my best friends.
They purr.
They cuddle.
They know when I am sad.

My cats all have a personality of their own.
They make me laugh.
They make me curious.
They make me annoyed.

I am a crazy cat lady.

Art is my escape.
I’m sad, I paint.
I’m happy, I paint.
I’m bored, I paint.

I love colour, contrast and abstract.

The moment my brush touches the canvas,
I am taken to a surreal world.

Here,
I am calm,
At peace,
With my soul.

Forever.

I’ve moved around,
From group home to group home.
Trying to find myself in a world full of judgement.

I’ve seen things,
I’ve heard things,
I’ve tried things,
That no girl should experience.

But I have no regrets.
Experience builds personally and wisdom.

I hope to go into the field of social science.
To share with youth my experiences.

Help others understand that;
There is hope,
There is love,
And there is help.

I want to open other’s eyes,
To accept that hate exists,
But that it does not need to control you.

Nothing can control you,
Only
You,
Can
Control,
You.

I have times where I lose hope.
My emotions overwhelm me.
I fixate on irrelevant details.

Anxiety attack.

Count to ten.
Take deep breaths.
Distract myself.

Happy thoughts,
Happy thoughts,
Happy thoughts.

These moments I have,
Are quick.
They don’t describe my character.

They describe a battle that I have won.

No longer hurting people.
No longer hurting myself.
No longer freaking out.

I have won this battle.

I’ve grown a lot in the past 5 years.
Grown as;
An individual,
A woman,
An artist,
A person.

My name is Olive, and this is 2013.



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This article has 12 comments.


on May. 12 2014 at 10:00 am
TrishDestiny PLATINUM, Jerantut , Pahang, Other
45 articles 2 photos 93 comments

Favorite Quote:
“When it's over, I want to say: all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

When it is over, I don't want to wonder
if I have made of my life something particular, and real.
I don't want to find myself sighing and frightened,
or full of argument.

I don't want to end up simply having visited this world.”

This is so amazing,,something i could relate to actually. Its as if someone is writing about me or something. It reflects the adversities we have had inside us. The moment we grow into years of maturity. Everything!!! This is totally awesome Blue Olive!

on May. 12 2014 at 9:58 am
TrishDestiny PLATINUM, Jerantut , Pahang, Other
45 articles 2 photos 93 comments

Favorite Quote:
“When it's over, I want to say: all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

When it is over, I don't want to wonder
if I have made of my life something particular, and real.
I don't want to find myself sighing and frightened,
or full of argument.

I don't want to end up simply having visited this world.”

facebook .com /groups/awesometeenz/ This is the link to the Awesome Teen Inkers!!!!

blueolive GOLD said...
on Feb. 28 2014 at 12:40 pm
blueolive GOLD, Bowmanville, Other
13 articles 2 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You cant go looking for love, you have to let love find you".

i couldnt find the group ! theres so many!

on Feb. 27 2014 at 10:16 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

not a problem hun. I love reading things that mirror my own life. :)  

blueolive GOLD said...
on Feb. 27 2014 at 12:08 pm
blueolive GOLD, Bowmanville, Other
13 articles 2 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You cant go looking for love, you have to let love find you".

Thanks haley, i will join the group when i get home as i cant acess facebook at school. thank you so much for your feedback on this particular piece :)

on Feb. 26 2014 at 8:46 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

you're so very welcome. writers like you are the people that keep my ambition for writing going; you are a voice: an intense, simple and creative one at that. Your words are relatable, and yet they probe and shake the formation of writing as a whole. Your style and one's like it are what I aspire to; they create a drastic change in how the written word is read and passed on. 

on Feb. 26 2014 at 8:42 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

You can look it up and request to join and either Trish Destiny or I will allow you access! Thanks :) I think you'll enjoy sharing your writing and getting to know others' as well. It's Awesome Teen Inkers ;)

blueolive GOLD said...
on Feb. 26 2014 at 3:34 pm
blueolive GOLD, Bowmanville, Other
13 articles 2 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You cant go looking for love, you have to let love find you".

this piece was really personal to me....this is my life in a poem. i wrote this last year but it still stands for who i am today. this is one of my works i am most proud of. thankyou so much haley101

blueolive GOLD said...
on Feb. 26 2014 at 3:28 pm
blueolive GOLD, Bowmanville, Other
13 articles 2 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You cant go looking for love, you have to let love find you".

i would love to join the group! do i have to be invited or can i search it up and join? im very flattered that you have read a lot of my work:) i enjoy reading yours:)

on Feb. 25 2014 at 8:05 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

the group has about 200 people now, so it's not just a little thing. thought you'd love to know that!   

on Feb. 25 2014 at 8:04 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

I have a suggestion for you, as well. There's a group that I started with a few other girls from teenink on facebook, where we all share our writing and comment and what not and discuss topics related to writing, or things like we're peeved about how teenink works... anyway. I've gotten to know all of them so well, and they're like sisters and brothers to me, from around the world. I'd love to invite you to this group so you can share your writing and get to know these people!! let me know ;)  

on Feb. 25 2014 at 7:57 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

blueolive, I love this sooo much. To me, this is not only incredibly you, but it is incredibly prosaic and beautiful. It's a teenage girl; it's a thousand teenage girls; and sometimes it's what makes you exactly who you are. The thing that struck me the most while reading this piece was the creativity of it, and the humanity. Like... you're so free spirited, when you say you drink blueberry tea, paint, and write and bake cheesecakes. but then, you go on to say you cry and have anxiety problems and strive for routine. to me, that is not only human but beautiful, and I thought, wow. I want to live in this girl's shoes. Amazing job. Love this