That Girl In The Mirror | Teen Ink

That Girl In The Mirror

January 15, 2014
By AleighMarie BRONZE, North Adams, Massachusetts
AleighMarie BRONZE, North Adams, Massachusetts
2 articles 6 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

I see her everyday
I see the smile on her face
But I know most of it’s fake
Very few can relate
Just a few know first hand
Most of them just hate
The things they don’t understand

When there’s so much in your head
Things that need to be said
But you can’t even open your mouth
Let alone let the words fall out
Because every time you open your mouth
Someone’s there to slam you down

So what happens when you aren’t taught how to cope?
When you aren’t taught how to fight
When you aren’t taught what’s wrong and what’s right
And you just need to get it all out
But no ones around
You couldn’t talk anyways
Because no one showed you how

When you’re at war with yourself and losing
When everyday is an uphill battle
And you fall farther than you climbed
When you’re too afraid to ask for help
When you can’t escape your own mind

We pick a controllable pain
Burns that make us forget everything
Picking at scabs and reopening them
Pulling hairs that make us who we are
And most commonly
Taking a blade and leaving a scar

It’s all vented by our own sick inventions
We think we’re the only ones with such an intention
But we’re not

The relief that’s given
From the blood that’s taken
Some think it’s for attention
But it’s just the way we cope and manage
It’s not healthy but what happens when we don’t?
When there’s so much uncontrollable pain
We need some control over ourselves
But we lose control
And we let it all go

That uncontrollable pain
It’s not hard to say
The sources are plentiful

The pain from being rejected
Told you’re not good enough
From being the last choice
From being told you can’t have a voice

The pain from the abuse
The pain from being used
The pain of being told you’re nothing
And no one there to tell you you’re something

The pain from missing someone
Dead or alive
Someone who doesn’t care that you’re alive
Someone who you want in your life
But the bond can’t survive

The pain from not being a priority to one who made you
The pain of knowing they’ll never pick you
Knowing they went your whole life and didn’t want you
From a father choosing his wife over his own daughter

From being told you have to stay strong
When you just want to fall
From being told your feelings are wrong
You can’t be angry at all

From being abandoned and thrown away
From being told who you feel for isn’t okay
So many reasons
So many people
All they need is a friend

Someone to teach them
How to fight
How to survive
How to talk
How to smile
How to cope
Someone to teach them how to take control
Without losing control

Some think it’s an attempt to die
But that’s just another myth, a lie
Those who bleed don’t want to die
They just want to feel
And know that they are real

I see her everyday
Cover her scars and hide the pain
I try so hard but I can’t make it go away
I want to save her
But how can I save her if she can’t save herself?

The author's comments:
This is a project from Psychology. We had to pick disorders and find a way to explain them. I chose cutting/self harm because I have personal experience. I hope to reach out to other teens who hurt themselves. IT GETS BETTER. <3

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