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Corner of First and Amistad

January 1, 2014
By Shahrier PLATINUM, Colma, California
More by this author
Shahrier PLATINUM, Colma, California
28 articles 10 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm a river that no longer flows" - a friend
"when the people lead, leaders follow" - Gandhi

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All I do these days is sit around
In the corner of my room
Never making a sound
And even though my eyes are wide open
I can’t see the palm in front of my face
Can’t see my life as it slowly decays

I feel so lost in the voids of my mind
Searching for something to put my mind to ease
But there is nothing I can find
Why do I feel the way I do
I have good friends around me
Yet I feel so blue

I feel like I’m losing my faith in people these days
I feel so lonely but I don’t want to go back to my friends
The very thing I want, I wish they’d stay away
What is it that I miss, what is it that I want
I’m still just sitting in the corner of my room
Trying to figure out my emotional assault

There is nothing wrong with me
There is nothing I can complain about
So why am I lost in thought, away from reality
Why am I so needy, desperate for you to keep me company
Why do I push every one away
So maybe you will finally come to me

Why do I sit in the corner, why not just go enjoy the day
Why can’t I cure my sorrows
I don’t want them to stay
I wish I knew how to fix these wounds, I wish I had the strength to do so
I don’t care to know what I feel
I just want to know how to stop these crippling blows.

© Jason B., Colorado Springs, CO

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 10 comments.

Shahrier PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 18 2014 at 10:30 pm
Shahrier PLATINUM, Colma, California
28 articles 10 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm a river that no longer flows" - a friend
"when the people lead, leaders follow" - Gandhi

View profile
Thanks. teenink wont publish this poem of mine, but i think youd like this one better. (im gonna try to resubmit it again. 
  Some days are spent with, scribbles on paper with pen. My life runs through my mind, but I cannot write any of it down.   Some days are spent with hours wasted staring out the window. Watching as the wind blow, but I cannot find the strength to move.   Some days are spent with, shadows on my wall. Unlike me, they know how to stand up tall, but I cannot find the motivation to join them.   Some days are spent with, whole series watched in a single day. Darken room without a stroke of the sun’s rays, but I cannot find the enjoyment in what I do.   Some days are spent with, desperate attempts at outside contact. Doing all I can to get a conversation going, but I cannot overcome my fear of pushing people away.   Some days are spent with, red ink all over my paper. Stained with my blood and tears, but I cannot find the power to end it all just yet.
JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 17 2014 at 6:43 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 523 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

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Amazing - this is truly relatable to me :) You're an awesome writer! :)
haley101 DIAMOND said...
on Jan. 17 2014 at 10:07 am
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

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yes, teachers tend to do that; it's rather awful, is it not? your music is a tad bipolar, and you have even more of a range than I do. I listen to Winston and Shmidt, but then I'd go to Ron Pope and Imagine Dragons. totally different. but hey, whatever works. ;) have fun with the much work!
Shahrier PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 16 2014 at 8:54 pm
Shahrier PLATINUM, Colma, California
28 articles 10 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm a river that no longer flows" - a friend
"when the people lead, leaders follow" - Gandhi

View profile
i like other music too. i listen to a very wide selection. i like hopsin, tech n9ne, red, papa roach, imagine dragons and five finger death punch. ^_^ my friend calls my music bipolar. if you pay super close attention to my poems, every now and then, i would slip a line from a song into them. i better get back to homework. my teachers are really working me these days. 
haley101 DIAMOND said...
on Jan. 16 2014 at 10:47 am
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

View profile
I can't believe that you love the music that I love. That's great. It's pretty cool that I caught that about the tittle too  
Shahrier PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 15 2014 at 9:02 pm
Shahrier PLATINUM, Colma, California
28 articles 10 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm a river that no longer flows" - a friend
"when the people lead, leaders follow" - Gandhi

View profile
it is from the fray. "you found me" inspired the title. because god found him, pr he found himself, at the corner of first and amistad, and well, sometimes i feel im still lost, in the middle of nowhere. aka first and amistad. i love the fray and the script, and onerepublic, and much more.
haley101 DIAMOND said...
on Jan. 15 2014 at 10:25 am
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

View profile
This is The Fray, am I right? First and Amistad is where he finds the one and only smoking a cigarette on the street corner? That's what struck me about the tittle. Check it out: You Found Me, The Fray  
Shahrier PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 4 2014 at 12:43 pm
Shahrier PLATINUM, Colma, California
28 articles 10 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm a river that no longer flows" - a friend
"when the people lead, leaders follow" - Gandhi

View profile
if this explains your life, i hope you soon recover. this is what my life is alike as well and i wish this pain upon no one. to escape the pain, even if temporarily, i write, and as long as i feel i will write.
Shahrier PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 4 2014 at 12:28 pm
Shahrier PLATINUM, Colma, California
28 articles 10 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'm a river that no longer flows" - a friend
"when the people lead, leaders follow" - Gandhi

View profile
i hope you recover if this sad tale represents your life. im still stuck in the fiery depths of hell, waiting for the day when ill stop hurting over the past. untill then, i will write to my hearts content. :)
starrynightangel BRONZE said...
on Jan. 4 2014 at 4:56 am
starrynightangel BRONZE, Muscat, Other
1 article 0 photos 18 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nostalgia is a seductive liar.

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This explains my life..   Loved it.. Keep writing :)