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In love with a horse

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His Flowing, golden mane flies smoothly
As he gallops, spurring up a trail of dust
Thump, thump, thump, thump.

He moves rhythmically,
As if making a tune
My heart beat quickens, adrenaline rushes
And the ride is over all too soon.

Jumping down, I put my head up against his
And feel the warm, soft fur up against me
he snorts loudly, I cackle gleefully
And on the star on his forehead, I plant a kiss.



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dinksThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 3 at 10:38 pm
I used to ride horses, and can relate to the warmth they give one, and I think your poem captures this well. However, I feel as though it is a bit off rythm at times. However, good job!
 
live_luv_laugh_inspireThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Feb. 25 at 11:14 am
thanks, and thanks for your honest feedback! Its appreciated
 
TopHatCactusThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Feb. 3 at 6:17 pm
I don't have much expirence with horses but I can see the rush it gives you/ your character. (It's funny because there is a ad under your story about a game called 'horse breeding, join the community'. I thought that was halarious!)
 
live_luv_laugh_inspireThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Feb. 25 at 11:14 am
haha thats awesome!!
 
-Yin- said...
Feb. 2 at 8:24 pm
you remind me of my friend olivia... and you write in such a familiar way thats its homie.... keep it up doll
 
live_luv_laugh_inspireThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Feb. 25 at 11:15 am
thank you!
 
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