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My Way To Say Goodbye

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Should I say goodbye? But every time I try, the
Words get stuck like a lump in my throat.
Maybe I shouldn’t. Maybe I should disappear like thin air
From your life. I should kiss you good night while you
Sleep and get out of your house without looking back.
Maybe that way, it won’t hurt so much.

Should I say goodbye? Even though my heart screams, “No!”
There maybe a hundred reasons not to leave you
But I can’t keep holding on to you. As I lay my hand on top
Of your chest, you heart beats perfectly the same way I
Have loved you. The pain shots through me, lingering in my
Whole body. The steps I take are the goodbyes I ought to say.

Should I say goodbye? Your scent still lingers in my fingertips
And your smile still haunts me in my sleep. But no,
I have to leave this little town. My memories are scattered on
Every street—memories I want to forget and darling,
you are one of them.
I should leave quietly even if it means dragging myself inch by inch.

I should say goodbye. To the feelings we once had. We clenched too
Tightly to avoid losing it. In the end, we can’t escape the reality of goodbyes.
Leave the memories right where we abandoned them.
I know we won’t forget but we’ll move on with our lives.
Darling, I cry this last time for you.
A goodbye I wrote because I do not know how to say it to you.

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