i can't stop thinking of t help me

November 6, 2013
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Can you believe the things you cant see?
the words, the sweet both reminders of what used to be
i loved him them i love him now
i can't get those feelings out of this house
i want to yell i want to scream.
why can't it just let me be?!
he's long gone and i'm right here
f*** it how do i get healed?
i loved, i broke. now i'm sitting in this empty bed
thinking about him again
i wish i wouldn't i know i can't
cause i found a better man
but here i am
once again
crying, wishing, for an empty head
he's so sweet, and so kind
it makes me want to run and hide
so different from what used to be
but at the same similar things
now and then it is here
now and then it disappears
i love him and he loves me
so why can't i let things be
i know he's perfect for me
lately when he's around
our heart beats sync and we lock eyes
i hate how that reminds me
triggered thoughts
triggered memories
i hate how i ruin everything
why can't i have a new beginning
because i know deep down which is right for me
and its not
the one who used to be
not the one who lied
not the one who made me cry
f*** life
i hate these thoughts
make it stop
make me see
i need more help before i regret things
because i don't want to lose the one i just recieved

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