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Another Metaphor of Life This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

bubbles.
god’s just a little kid
with a big bottle
of Miracle Bubbles
and a wand
dipping, blowing these
bubbles
all doomed to

pop

at one point or another.
they either drop
too fast, before
he can catch them,
or the biggest ones
pop!
before they’ve even
been launched.
it’s the little ones
that leave quietly
and take their time

gently

drifting

down

everyone leaves a mark,
you know,
but sooner or later
they’ve all evaporated.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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FrAme said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 6:32 pm
I liked the speed and how smooth it was to read, but I don't feel like there was enough feeling behind the words.
 
StarryRoss replied...
Jan. 18, 2012 at 6:16 pm
Ha i really don't think it needed any more 'feeling behind the words.' The way it almost feels detached enhances it, i think it would sound like they're trying way too hard if they went back to add 'feeling.' Not all poems need it, that's what makes some great.
 
vivig4ever replied...
Jun. 20, 2012 at 6:17 pm
i agree. i think it's better if none of them had an author's explanation. that's the point of petry; for every person to find their own meaning in a small group of creative, unexplainable words.
 
Big k said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 2:51 pm
good job but you forgot the part were he stabs all the others whith the wand
 
youngspeare said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 7:53 am
nice work adams! 
Think you could check out my work sometime? Would really appreciate your feedback :)
 
Refugemywords said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 7:04 am
Pretty good origin for the poem. The pace and tempo is great. I love the idea, bubbles...
 
BadGirl said...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 8:26 pm

I loved it! I liked how you got the idea :)

I'm new here, but when I get stuff posted could you check it out?

 
ifonly303 said...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 7:33 pm
I really liked this your writting gets so deep... Please Continue
 
GirlWhoWrote said...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 5:41 pm
i love this metaphor! People PLEASE check out my work!!!!
 
cgwriter replied...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 7:04 pm
I like it too
 
Beth328 replied...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 7:24 pm
Very good metaphor. And i love bubbles
 
ashleyn said...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 5:38 pm
I love this metaphor! Crazy what some imagination (and bubbles) can create. Wonderful work of art <3
 
Dreammer said...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 5:06 pm
I apsolutly love this poem people feel free to llook at and comment on my work
 
JuneTaz said...
Nov. 13, 2011 at 12:20 pm
Love the metaphor!! It really does describe life. Keep up the philosophical thinking! ;)
 
GirlWhoWrote said...
Oct. 22, 2011 at 8:33 pm
This is awesome! Check out my work plleeeeassse!!!!!!
 
Lahari said...
Oct. 22, 2011 at 4:12 pm
This is amazing! Can you checkout some of my work?
 
JamesODalaigh This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 22, 2011 at 3:39 pm
Really loved it. please, keep up the fantastic work!
 
xximjustmexx said...
Oct. 22, 2011 at 1:02 pm
You poem has a gentler and nicer affect than mine. I was also writing about the same thing, how sooner or later everything someone does is later forgotten and not worth anything anymore. It's called Bad Image. There's also another one called Stronger, it's not quite about the same thing, but it's somewhat related. I would really appriecate it if you ckecked them out;) ohh. I gave this a 5/5 btw. great job:)
 
ms.liz2015 said...
Oct. 22, 2011 at 10:39 am
good job i liked it.
 
EyesofBlueFire said...
Oct. 22, 2011 at 10:11 am
I love this poem. :) I like how it's not really religious, even though you use "god". The capitalization can be necessary or unnecessary when you use it in such a way. It does have a certain view on life that not alot of people see. :) Keep writing.
 
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