Avalanche

Custom User Avatar
More by this author
It's pushing down hard on my chest
and all I can do is try to catch my breath.
Been this way for such a long time
you think you're a quarter and I'm a dime.
I get beat step by step,
but you just wait you'll get what you get.
The sky is starting to grow black,
but I am not afraid, I don't take a step back.
I think this is my chance to be free,
to get away from the rules and finally be me.
The shadow engulfs my body
and the crows caw in harmony.
Then, the avalanche begins to fall
and on top of me there's an unleashed wall.
I guess I was right that there is no hope,
because I am only attached to your rope.
I bet you're happy to see my pain,
to you my life is a little game.
I try to get up and away from this mess
the stress holds me down and whispers, 'Take a rest.'
But I can't do that, I taste the grey in my life
and now I am starting to think twice.
I won't give-up because that's not who I am,
but I am going to give you the avalanche.
Here, please take it.. a gift from me to you.
You get to have all the things that you've put me through.





Join the Discussion

This article has 5 comments. Post your own now!

estucker1998 said...
Aug. 19, 2013 at 10:03 am
Hey! First off, YOU'RE WRITING A NOVEL??!!! That's great! I can't wait to read it ;) Okay, now for the poem. Ummm... I loved it! It had great imagery and the symbolism of the avalanche was just perfect. You can tell the bitterness in this poem, and it's great. Nice work! Keep writing! By the way, can I read you novel? Ha ha! ;) 
 
Laugh-it-Out This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 27, 2013 at 9:36 pm
Ok first, Mckay's post had me cracking up 'Lexus brah' haha ok as for your amazing poem!! I really liked the imagery and the symbolism of the avalanche. As far as criticism or helpfulness, i think that some things could have been a bit more show not tell, and also some of the rhyming seems a little forced. The last lines are pretty frikin priceless though!! I mean bam! I really liked it. Also, i think you overused the word avalanche. I mean i know that that's the symbol/motif of the poem, but m... (more »)
 
Mckay This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 23, 2013 at 5:19 pm
Can't wait to read this novel you're collabing with Andy, brah. The dime and quarter imagery, for me, for whatever reason, is just memorable. I love it! The title reminds me of moutains and snow, of course. Which makes me happy. I can forget the ridiculous humidity here for a while. And the feeling of not giving up makes me want to be the same. A fighter, not quitting becuase someone else wants you to. Pick yourself up and get into the game. Well done, Lexus, brah.
 
Krasota This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 20, 2013 at 6:44 pm
SASSY ENDING! I love this XD Of course, I love it even more 'cause you and Drag are collaborating and he's gonna use this which is A.W.E.S.O.M.E. since two of my favourite writers are working together. ^_^ Overall, the imagery in this is EPIC and I love how you managed to rhyme without letting it get in the way of the meaning. Great job!
 
SoulPoetry said...
Jul. 20, 2013 at 6:28 pm
(First comment- yay!) Ok first off, I love the emotion in this poem. The "you're a quarter and I'm a dime" line is priceless! I have to say this is one of my favorite poems and you, miss, are my favorite poet :) Your rhyming skill are spot-on. Once i read the author's comments i was expecting something totally different but that's what makes you great. You always manage to surprise me with your wonderful skill. Great job and one day you'll be a well known poet in th... (more »)
 
bRealTime banner ad on the left side
Site Feedback