Dream Spiral

June 22, 2013
By StarGazer9 GOLD, Marana, Arizona
StarGazer9 GOLD, Marana, Arizona
19 articles 0 photos 80 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never let the odds keep you from doing what you know in your heart you were meant to do."


Warmth from beneath the covers
sinks my unconscious mind
into a state of beauty
where imagination prevails time

A flood of distant wonders
now bright with new intent
creates a world of color
to relive the life less spent

fantasy overpowers
reality of sorts
and bends the rules of physics
that reality supports

when our minds decide to sleep
our senses seem to wake
and we invent the truth
that reality is fake

but when the moon grows tired
the sun shines bright again
the dream is overthrown
and the world is ruled by men

but it cannot be restrained
come night it will be back
so don't let life take over
dreams provide what real life lacks



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This article has 3 comments.


on Mar. 8 2015 at 9:00 pm
StarGazer9 GOLD, Marana, Arizona
19 articles 0 photos 80 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never let the odds keep you from doing what you know in your heart you were meant to do."

Thanks so much for the advice! It means a lot to me :)

Beila BRONZE said...
on Mar. 8 2015 at 3:15 am
Beila BRONZE, Palo Alto, California
3 articles 0 photos 519 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco." -Mark Twain

This is another poem (first read 'Tsunami') where I love your use of rhyme! The "fantasy overpowers" stanza is my favorite, but I love how you create this whole whimsical feeling within the poem that seems to be itself born of dreams. The only thing I'd point out: things usually prevail *over* things. I understand that that would have changed your rhyme, but perhaps some alternatives that would be grammatically correct could include: outruns, overrules, reigns over, conquers?

on Jul. 3 2013 at 4:52 pm
thezebrasgray PLATINUM, Taylorsville, Utah
46 articles 0 photos 231 comments
This is interesting and original. I love your word choice as well!


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