Celestial Space

June 20, 2013
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You and I are celestial;
‘us’ has shifted and floated to space.
There’s no telescope I could buy
that could find the galaxy with our memories.
At a time you were my idol
then our friendship was idolized,
but now we are only problematic.
I heard their fatuous words to you
but I sought no worry as you were extrovert.
You were right;
I am not good with assumptions or observations:
my greatest hamartia.
Looking back I see you were introvert,
I wish I’d noticed sooner.
You told me you had athazagoraphobia;
you were afraid of being forgotten.
I’ll never forget you, but I think you’ve forgotten me.
Visiting you was scary:
your face, once so guileless was now cadaverous.
It was like looking through a kaleidoscope;
the pigment in your skin seeping,
the shape of your body melting,
the sound of your voice suppressed.
Past my Suburban I walked
and down the street I ran to your house.
That’s when I got nyctophobia.
Dark was your house and dark was your face.
Dark was engulfing me like your cigar smoke.
It held me down just as their words held you…
My eyelids, stopping the tears, closed;
I saw your guileless face and our cheeks touched.
You said, ‘Let’s get away from here. They’re not like us.’
I pushed you away and suddenly you turned to star dust.
I woke with hands desperate for your grasp
and a mind depraved.
And then I got oneirophobia.
I am afraid of dreams. I am afraid of the dark.
I am afraid of knowing that you are dead.
For you, for us, I should have looked further into space.
I should have seen that they hurt you.
But, at least we aren’t celestial any longer:
I have memory of you now, in your casket.

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estucker1998 said...
Aug. 19, 2013 at 9:59 am
Wow. That was great--as always. It took me a minute to get the story, but once I did, it was fantastic. I loved how you put in all the different kinds of fears, and I love the show of their friendship and how you show what happens after the first friend dies. Beautiful, in a terribly haunting sort of way. I have a few new things if you want to check them out, by the way. 
Mckay This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 23, 2013 at 5:14 pm
At first, I was like, "What the h*ll is Lexus talking about fears?" But when I got to the end, I understood it all. Lexus, this is marvelous. Absolutely marvelous. I could visualize everything. It reminded me of the stars go out one by one, except this one is slightly happier. I love love love love love love love love (8 HA!) the emotion in this. How the guy promises to run away then becomes star dust. It's like Coldplay music video. With all the colors and stars. Truly beautiful. ... (more »)
bree_bree said...
Jul. 3, 2013 at 5:07 pm
I love this peice its thoughtfull and the fact that you use big words makes me feel like im not the only person who likes them :) the emotions kind of seep into you as your reading and i really like that. Great work.
thatunknownthingThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 30, 2013 at 4:40 am
Whoa, good poetry here, great vocab, and smooth. I liked it. 4/5 :) Feedback on some of my stuff if you can?
Krasota This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 29, 2013 at 8:19 pm
PHOBIA CENTRAL RIGHT HERE.Okay, I love this poem and how you used "hamartia." My only suggestion is that you try not to let big vocabulary get in the way of the poem's overall rhythm. Otherwise, awesome job!
Court901 said...
Jun. 27, 2013 at 3:04 pm
Your diction is wonderful. This is so different from all the "simple" poems I'm used to reading. This is deep and meaningful and full of amazing descriptions. Great job.
SoulPoetry said...
Jun. 25, 2013 at 7:50 pm
(clap) (clap) (clap) bravo Lexus, another job well done! I love all the little phobias you wrote in this poem :P You're such a wonderful poet and your words are stiched together so perfectly :) keep up the good work!!! :D
GraphicWriter This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 24, 2013 at 8:52 pm
Holy words of amazement that aren't aloud to be posted! I found all your phobias in this poem very intriguing, very smart and witty. It was gripping and awesome, the only thing that I didn't like was that the beginning and the end weren't very connect; like those strings got cut off somewhere in the middle. But very good. Very captivating.
Laugh-it-Out This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 24, 2013 at 8:11 pm
Omg Lexus this was frikin amazing!!! I love this more than words can describe. Soooooo amazing.i am just trying to get over it. My hear litteraly stopped this was so good. For a second non rhyming poem this was amazing. I love It. I am favoriting it. Oh and by the way, i wanted to ask you if I could borrow your thank you poem idea and like have the poem titles woven into the poem. That poem was also one of my favorites. Amazing job Lexus . Keep rockin
dragonsandthree said...
Jun. 22, 2013 at 7:50 pm
WOW!!!!! This is AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I loved the way that you kept using different tyoes of phobias. And I'm glad that you said what they mean, because I had no idea! Great job, Lexus!
Labradorian This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 1, 2013 at 11:08 am
I've read a few of your rhyming poems, and after reading this, I can tell you I seriously suggest you dipping into more free verse. You have an elloquence that really revealed itself in a poem without the confines of rhyme sceme, and I was really impressed with not only your vocabulary, but how you used it for repetition of themes and emotions. Definately five stars. I look forward tor eading more.
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