Fear was my Truth | Teen Ink

Fear was my Truth

May 30, 2013
By ash_always SILVER, Calcutta, Other
ash_always SILVER, Calcutta, Other
7 articles 14 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
You shall love your crooked neighbor
with your crooked heart - Auden


Your frantic search will end in peace,
That is, if you search at all.
Blinded by the definition of what you’re looking for,
You drift, constantly, away.
The mind wonders from star to star,
If each star is a wish waiting to be wished upon,
Why do we not get what we want?
The moon lies dismantled,
Behind the curtains of floating clouds,
Aimless, towards infinity.
Its scars help us relate,
To sunken, half smiling faces,
Which define who we really are behind,
Eyes which penetrate the soul,
And with each story unraveled,
We find ourselves, having the same dark side.
With each time our hearts are lost and found,
We fear, fear ourselves of the mistake
Which an individual is bound to make,
That is, of course, expectation.
I have faith in you,
For I expect you to be there,
And with those wise words our miseries begin.
We leave things unsaid,
Switch off the lights and pack up our memories.
In fear of empting the half filled cup,
You breathe deeper instead,
Instead of saying a word,
You stand alone dramatically,
Under dismayed skies,
Pouring its pity on you,
Trying to wash it all away.
You follow the lines on your tear stained face,
They race each other,
They make you shiver,
Remembrance is painful yet a means of survival.
For even though they are packed away,
They persist.
Dizzy thoughts circle your mind,
Darkness hovers as you fear.
Fear, for you have fallen again.
And you are free falling, just falling.

You fight alone,
With skinned hearts, you bleed,
And it won’t be long
Before you find yourself
Drowning, deeper within you,
Fearing you aren’t who you thought you were.
A constant, crystal clear river of questions,
Run through your veins,
For you grew up way too fast,
Belief is now a chore,
Suffering a ritual,
And pain?
Pain is just what you are left behind with.
The faint morning light dawns upon you,
You wake with fear in your heart,
You’re so human and flawed.
So now you conclude,
That your existence is filled with hope,
You expect, hence fear arises again,
From the ashes, each emotion awakens,
The ones that once killed you,
For you had died, over and over again,
The same ones brings you back,
Only to make you realize,
That you always knew what was at stake,
And so, you knew,
That fear was your only truth.



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