The Unknown

May 23, 2013
By RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 290 comments

Favorite Quote:
All of us fave failed to match our dream of perfection. I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. -William Faulkner


Everything is so bright
And vivid
Outside of these grey,
Drab walls.
There's something there,
I can feel it,
Lying right in my gaze
And yet I can't see it.

I long for the day when
I'll have the means to see again,
To see the things that a
Person can only see alone.
It's not just being independent,
It's the life of it all,
Really living with your heart
Pumping and everything else
Pumping in sync.

The air is sweeter outside
These four walls,
Even this whole town,
There's something in the distance.

The sunlight is golden,
Dripping in complications,
A stream of energy that you can
Hold in your hand.

I want to hear
The music of my own,
Not the melodies of another.
I want to think with
Clear dictation and direction
And not worry about the
Consequences.

I want to do all the
Cliche' things with a smile,
Not a grin.
Grins are for the ill at heart,
The ones that feel no glee
Or joy,
Just the need to smile
And yet a grin lie bare on your
Face.

Maybe I'm wishing for too much,
Exalting in the dreams of a fool.
I'll calm down for a few
More years
But I'm afraid it's too late,
The bug is eating at my soul.
This bug yearns for more
Than I can give or take,
Feels every blow more clearly
And precisely.
It affects everyone sooner
Or later
But it has taken to me
Unfortunately.
The bug hates smiles,
The bug loves grins.
The bug wants no one to win.

If life must go on
Without me,
Why can everyone else be free?



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This article has 29 comments.


on May. 28 2013 at 8:37 pm
nautiicaled BRONZE, Elk Grove, California
1 article 0 photos 28 comments
This is seriously wonderful. You have a skill at poetry I admit it! This is well written with a good story behind it.

on May. 28 2013 at 2:58 pm
RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 290 comments

Favorite Quote:
All of us fave failed to match our dream of perfection. I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. -William Faulkner

Thanks for checking it out and for your nice comment!

on May. 28 2013 at 2:57 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 445 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

I love this! I especially like what you said about grinning XD That one was a real clencher for me in the poem. Great job! :D

on May. 28 2013 at 11:19 am
RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 290 comments

Favorite Quote:
All of us fave failed to match our dream of perfection. I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. -William Faulkner

Thank you for the comment! I always get so excited when my page says that I have a new comment and I have to go see it that second! Thank you so much! I'm going to go check out your poem too, from all the work that I've sampled from you, it should be the same as all the rest: perfect!

on May. 28 2013 at 11:10 am
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hey there! I love the title, the title itself is unknown. It really catches the reader's attention, wanting to KNOW what this unknown thing is. So, in the end, the poem goes known. Oh, how interesting to really think about that. Anyways, I love the picture, it really went with your refrences of the city. This was a great, full poem. I enjoyed the length of it and the variety of sizes of the stanzas. I love the emotion you convey, it's all so real, I can feel it in my bones. I love when writer's do single word lines to really emphasize and I was so glad you did. Great job! You're really talented. In a way this reminded me of my poem 'Wolves Among Sheep'.. maybe this could be the before and my poem is the after effects. If you'd like to you could give it a look:) Anyways, again, wonderful job! 

PhoebeB GOLD said...
on May. 27 2013 at 11:16 am
PhoebeB GOLD, Lexington, Massachusetts
10 articles 0 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent."
-Victor Hugo

I really love this poem. It turns out, for me, to be very sad at the end. Well, actually, I felt like from the middle to the end, I got this really remorseful feeling/mood from the piece. I think it was really touching, and as TheEpic95 said earlier, it was rather relatable which definitely upped the quality of the work for me. I felt like I could understand the character's struggles. How they wanted something more from their life, yet they knew they could never have it. Anywho, great job on the poem! I really love what you did with the concept of unhappiness and life, and really everything about your work! It was incredible and I really love it!1 PS I'm writing a poem right now that shares a similar theme to your poem. Would it be okay with you if I used your line "Exalting in the dreams of a fool?" It's okay if you don't want me to use it... thought I might ask. :)

on May. 27 2013 at 10:47 am
RoyalCorona SILVER, Grand Rapids, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 290 comments

Favorite Quote:
All of us fave failed to match our dream of perfection. I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible. -William Faulkner

Thank you so much for replying! It means a lot! Yeah, I thought of nectar too! I feel this way almost every day no matter what and I try to break free of it but it's like shackles on me, I can't shake the feeling. 

on May. 27 2013 at 10:44 am
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear.” -Edgar Guest

Wow. Now this is a really relatable work. Who dosent long to live life more fully? To be imeresed in the colorfulness of real reality? I know what it's likw to feel contain, to feel as if the walls about youbare gray, lifeless things that suck you into their own conformity and liflessness, to be at thebpoint where even complications are sweet by comparison. That was the impression I got. "The sunlight is golden/dripping in complications." Somehow the combination of golden and dripping made me think of nectar, and almost long for to meet some trouble so I could smile sweetly in its face and enjoy the freshness and newness of it.

on May. 25 2013 at 4:32 pm
BookNerd35 GOLD, Herod, Illinois
10 articles 1 photo 60 comments

Favorite Quote:
There are so many people out there who will tell you that you can't. What you've got to do is turn around and say, 'watch me.' -unknown

Loved it! Just like all the ones I've read. However, I think I liked The Traveller just a tad bit more. All in all though, I still loved it! (For some reason I can't rate it. But if I could I 'd give it a 5)


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