When I was growing up
All I knew was "A"
Then one day, I learned there were others
B, C, D, F
How good it felt
To get something different on the top of my test

The feeling was addicting
I was hitting high school
I craved the feeling of inperfection
It made me feel normal
Like I wasn't just some nerd

But now, the addiction
Has come back
To hurt me

With one small C
I can never
Get into Math Honors Society

I am not a grade
A letter cannot
Define who I am

But I am still a minor
And my life
And my legal rights
Lay in the hands of my mother

I will not
Let an exam grade decide my fate
However, my guilt shall

Why do I feel guilty for finding
That math is not all that I am?
How is that one grade,
One denied application from an honors society,
Can cause me to feel this way?
To make me believe
That life is no longer worth living