Always loved you...

April 12, 2013
Heart filled with something I can't exactly name,
Maybe it's longing, maybe guilt or maybe pain,
A whole year had gone,
And I couldn't still believe,
That there could have been something ahead for us,
I wish i had never left...

When I was with you,
When you were with me,
I couldn't have ever imagined that this would end,
It was so beautiful, the time we spent,
Flowing like water,
Shining like a gem,
Then came something that was totally unseen,
your illness,
that dreaded cancer,
Life was cruel and mean...

Time slowed down
Love was nowhere to be seen,
I thought that if you were going to die,
Why should I stay?
What would I get?
I thought I didn't love you anymore,
But I did...I was a coward...I didn't have the courage to stay...
When I should have...

So, I left you,
Alone in the dark,
Alone in the cold,
I can never forget your tear filled eyes...never.

There's no forgiving for what I did,
My mistake's unpardonable,
My crime can't be hid,
But I hope you understand,
Understand and forgive,
I hope you can,
My torn heart sew...

No, I'm not asking you to return,
I know you won't, you can't...

I need you to forgive me,
don't let my soul burn,
Burn in this fire of knowing that you will always hate me,
Even in that death so sad.

I love you forever,
And ever and ever more,
My pain, my love, my insanity, my guilt,
you were everything and still are,
Goodbye, my love...

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