Barbie Vs. Porcelain Doll

April 3, 2013
By 7_Ambitions GOLD, Bronx, New York
7_Ambitions GOLD, Bronx, New York
11 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Do you remember me
The girl that used to mean everything to you
Do you remember
I was every breath you took
I used to mean the world to you
But then things changed
I was no longer your # 1
Your main girl
Your ride and never die
You replaced me
Or should I say you found a substitute
Someone who wasn’t half as good
What did she have that I didn’t?
Beside a barcode
She wasn’t real she was a Barbie
But you left this Porcelain Doll for a piece of plastic
You only love her because she gave u everything you asked
You said she had everything
Well did that include class because
She was nothing but some side of the rode trash
You loved her for her looks
But baby boy you forgot to read between them lines
I might not be your last or even your next
But I'm positive I was your best
And its not even that I’m jealous
I just believe that you can do so much better
but if you disagree then let it be
And no I’m not gonna apologize for being honest
Because that’s like saying sorry for being real
just keep in mind there are so many other options


The author's comments:
Always remember a girls value.

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This article has 4 comments.


on Apr. 15 2013 at 7:10 pm
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hey there! I loved this a lot! I thought this line was wonderful, "She wasn’t real she was a Barbie
But you left this Porcelain Doll for a piece of plastic." That'd have to be my favorite. I love the title. I thought the comparison of a barbie and a porcelain doll was really interesting. I liked the concept a lot. I thought that it was going to end very bitter, but it actually ended with a bit of a 'good luck' like hey there are better people out there for you, even thought you betrayed me, just knwo you could do better. I like it, bitter-sweet.

on Apr. 15 2013 at 9:33 am
jmitchbb SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
8 articles 0 photos 25 comments
I agree, the rhythm and word choice were excellent. 

on Apr. 15 2013 at 2:19 am
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear.” -Edgar Guest

Hmm... the metaphore of barbie/vs porcelain doll is a pretty good one, but i cant help be not particularly be fond of it. To me, the point isnt that barbies are geniric and plastic that makes them so worthless, that would make trading someone imporant for someone metaphorically plastic horrendous. No... it is closer to horror that they are toys at all. To trade someone real for someone fake would be the bigger horror. I rebel internally at the speaker calling herself a toy of any type, since neither girl should ever be a toy, should ever be a plaything or sonething merely kept beacuae it amuses. Another issue im afraid i have with this would be the overall tone. Im sorry, but it has a bitter note. I know, that is probably what you wanted, who wouldnt be if they were treated like the speaker in the poem was? But i am afraid that it would have been better if it was laced lightly with a twinge of bitterness as opposed to oozing it from top to bottom. A bitter line here, a bitter line there to show the speaker's mood. As it is, ther eis really not much else noticable in it, all other elements are overwhelmed. For ecample it had a glorious and unique way of stating the same basic idea, of abandonment and replacement, over and over without sounding the same. However, combined with the bitterness, it was really tiring. Its just too heavy.

swat17 SILVER said...
on Apr. 14 2013 at 6:33 pm
swat17 SILVER, Mineral, Virginia
6 articles 0 photos 34 comments
This is great! I love the rhythm and word choice. The message was clear and strong. Well done!


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