Even with melatonin I’m awake in three hours
I wake with a jumping start
I have to calm my rapid heart
And soon my thoughts are racing in

Some days they’re about my future
Some days they’re about my past
In the end I fall back asleep only to be tortured
Nightmares worse than reality have me tossing and turning

When I wake a second time I don’t know where I am
A sudden paranoia scares me into tears
Whoever was in my nightmare is sitting at the foot of my bed
I calm enough to realize it’s just one of my book bags

My mind is again left idle
And so I begin to think
I try to latch on to the positive ones
But my hands slip from the cold numb

As my thoughts carry me
I blink back a few tears.
I’m alone when they finally fall.
I’m alone with all my fears.