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a nightmare about my mother

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I had a dream last night,
Where my youngest sister
Was getting beaten black and blue
Scabbed flaming red
By my mother.

I threw myself upon my youngest sister,
Begged Mother to stop beating her,
To beat me instead, but
To no avail. My youngest sister screamed
At first, shrieked with cries of pain,
And then, when the beating grew worse…
Not even able to scream, she only gasped
For breath, as if drowning, and clung onto my hand,
Leaving beads of blood on my hands
Where her nails dug in through her pain.
But through all the beating,
She never said a single word,
Only the tears streamed
Silently down her face.

Then my mother turned to me,
Threw me on the floor and began beating me
Mercilessly, with malicious relish, seeing me sob
And cling to the ground, biting down on my lips
And feeling tears stream down my face,
But most of all asking, pleading, Why? Why?
Why are you beating me? What did I do wrong?
Why are you hurting us like this…
Mamma?

But the woman beating me smiled her gleaming
Lovely smile, and saying with simple honesty,
Because I hate you,
She continued beating me, slashing into my flesh,
Until I hugged the earth, my only friend,
And tasted dust mingling with
My tears.
When I woke up and saw my mother sleeping next to me
Peacefully, a sweet smile on her kind, soft face,
I felt a rush of bitter remorse for my fears, my baseless dreams,
And stroking her cheeks felt drops of hot tears
Roll down my cheeks
And wet her closed, unknowing eyes.




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