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Drowning

To one that looks from afar
It looks like a splatter of blue
That extends in every single direction
And continues on for an eternity
With it’s waves that slowly crash
And eats away at the faded footprints
That are left in the sparkling sand
It feels welcoming and gentle
As it coughs out slight breathes
That fly across the horizon in cold blasts

But to one who closely looks
And inspects every little detail
Will notice that everything isn’t perfect
They will float calmly for awhile
But then as fast as a shark going for the kill
The tide will turn and they will find themselves
Gasping for air and screaming out
In rasps of horror and deep fear
Because they are rapidly drowning,
Drowning in which one calls “life”



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TheSkyOwesMeRainThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
today at 1:50 pm:
Wow - I love the contrast between the two verses. There's also the possibility of using the idea of ocean currents forever circulating to represent the fact that you can get lost in life and your troubles can never seem to end. 
 
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SteelersJdogThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Feb. 28 at 11:19 pm:
I like the metaphor in this, though I felt that it was a little bit telegraphed. That's alright though, it might have been the effect that you were going for. I like seeing different people's take on the unknown, and I think that this is a good example of that. Nice job!
 
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RarelyJadedThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Feb. 15 at 11:00 pm:
This is very good, I thought the imagery could be stronger but overall it made an impression:)
 
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