How to be Attractive (According to Society)

January 10, 2013
By Anonymous

You want to be well known and liked?
Be sexy, then; here’s my advice:
Be bronze or tan, not black or pale,
And have no wrinkles, pores, or scales.
Expose your body—butt and bust—
But hide your face with creams and blush.
And show no mercy to your hair;
Let neither heat nor wax be spared.
Don’t ever eat, but if you do,
Be sure to throw it up, and soon.
Neglect your mind, but not your looks,
Though it may mean your pocketbook.
Should all these measures fail to please,
Try surgery for what you need.
Obey these rules above all else,
And always hate your natural self.
Remember this, although it’s hard:
Appearance dictates who you are.



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This article has 17 comments.


on Nov. 16 2013 at 6:38 pm
Deej6595 BRONZE, Billerica, Massachusetts
3 articles 0 photos 375 comments

Favorite Quote:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.

I love the rhyme scheme that you used and the topic off what beauty is in the world is one that needs to be discussed about more. I love the whole sarcastic tone of this poem. Definitely one of my favorites.

on Jan. 29 2013 at 9:31 pm
hermybookworm1, Worton, Maryland
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"Nothing is impossible. Even the word itself says 'I'm possible'!" Audrey Hepburn

This is great! So far my favorite thing on TeenInk.

on Jan. 22 2013 at 8:20 pm
Jadestorm BRONZE, Boylston, Massachusetts
3 articles 4 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't ever put anything on paper that you don't believe in. Don't write just to be writing. It's worse then merely saying something because the printed word reaches so many. Always remember that, Beany.

I love your rythem. A lot of time it hard to find that flow, but you found it. Great work

on Jan. 18 2013 at 9:55 pm
HaagenDazzle BRONZE, Fargo, North Dakota
1 article 36 photos 55 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The mother art is architecture. Without an architecture of our own, we have no soul of our own civilization." Frank Lloyd Wright

I love your poem! The poetry flows so wonderfully and blatantly true :) keep up the great work

jar33 GOLD said...
on Jan. 18 2013 at 11:44 am
jar33 GOLD, Galena, Missouri
18 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Live every day as if it was your last" and "Always have Faith in our Savior"

this is amazing and this is so true

on Jan. 17 2013 at 9:00 pm
KristinC PLATINUM, Cupertino, California
27 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."
-F.Scott Fitzgerald, the Great Gatsby

"To write it, it took three months; to conceive it three minutes; to collect the data in it all my life."
-F. Scott Fitzgerald

This poem is incredible, and sadly realistic.  The rhythm is flawless!

on Jan. 17 2013 at 6:49 pm
Khiat2pretty SILVER, Sacramento, California
8 articles 2 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I wish my life is a video game so everyday I could push restart." -Jeremiah
Botley

The funny part about this is this is really how people think is the way they should view themselves. That is sad, i love myself flaws and all and everyone should. Regardless, i love this poem. aha

on Jan. 17 2013 at 5:08 pm
TickTockBANG SILVER, Botkins, Ohio
8 articles 0 photos 44 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I believe that what doesn't kill you simply makes you... stranger." --Joker

Lovely poem, and SO true for a lot of people. The rhyming isn't that cheesy, clunky stuff that makes a writer shift around a line to sound weird but rhyme at the end (cough, like me), so it made the whole thing flow nicely. 

va lo said...
on Jan. 17 2013 at 5:01 pm
va lo, New York, New York
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
love this article

Ace007 said...
on Jan. 17 2013 at 4:42 pm
Good rhyme scheme, but even better message. The sarcasm and truthfulness makes this poem stand out.

on Jan. 17 2013 at 2:21 pm
Luminescent4 SILVER, Liverpool, Other
7 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.” Dumbledore (Harry Potter and The Philosophers Stone)

Very good, nicely written, I applaud you. This clearly portrays the feeling of society in a fun way

on Jan. 17 2013 at 10:58 am
Whompingwillow, Oakville, Other
0 articles 0 photos 21 comments
awesome ;)

on Jan. 17 2013 at 10:25 am
Kayla_Guthrie GOLD, Philpot, Kentucky
11 articles 19 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
every now and then there comes someone so unuaually unique that everyone normal wishes to be unique in the same excat way.
~stedival a character from the book the accidental hero by matt myklucsh
i'm not sure if this word for word correct

i love how this accually protrays society and i think i hinted on some sarcasm. this made me grin ear to ear. wonderful job on this brilliantly put togethter piece.

PriyaA SILVER said...
on Jan. 17 2013 at 9:26 am
PriyaA SILVER, Mohali, Other
7 articles 0 photos 5 comments
Wow! the rhyme scheme was amazing! and you have brought out the truth in such a brilliant yet brief price of writing! Good Job! :)

on Jan. 17 2013 at 8:26 am
crazygracie SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 0 photos 6 comments
Wow this is beautiful! Your language is amazing, it was very realistic and portrayed an excellent view on society. Keep up the great work!

on Jan. 17 2013 at 12:41 am
TheSkyOwesMeRain GOLD, Irvine, California
13 articles 1 photo 303 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments which take your breath away.

You are only as strong as your weakest link.

I love this, and I really hate how society portrays beauty. Wonderful job. 

on Jan. 17 2013 at 12:12 am
seriouslyjustkidding SILVER, Irwin, Pennsylvania
7 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore!" - Edgar Allan Poe

This is so true. Great work. 




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