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This is not love
Though it be something close
To say that I like her
And her obnoxious little smile,
Would be as vast an understatement
As saying that God
Is not but a mast.
For every good Christian
Knows that He is not a mast,
Nor a mass that holds another
While the wind guides them
But the divided power that leads the Wind itself
With its invincible hand.
Surely, this understatement is vast.
So too is my fondness for this girl.
As a ship be led by the wind,
So my heart is led by this emotion.
For who could resist those innocent eyes
Or that fateful smile?
Who Wouldn’t fall for those flirty twists and turns that she so often does?
But I have yet to describe
My feelings for this girl!
Even now, they fall upon my heart
As a river upon a rock.
During my classes at the prison that they call a school,
I want her near me no matter what the cost.
I want her there beside me so that I may feel her voice
And hear her touch.
For every moment I am without her,
I feel a certain tightness in my chest.
It makes me shudder and take deep breaths every time I think of her.
Her very scent pulls me in
And my heart cries out for her.
Surely this is love, you think.
Surely, when he cannot live without her, it be love.
But lo, I must deny this powerful word
And let it lie deep in the recess of my mind
For no other to see but I.
The consciousness that guards its cell
Will convince me that it is not but a false thought, a fleeting one at that.
But no! I know the truth!
Six months of war with enemies that none shall ever know
Is what it took to get this girl!
I do feel it there!
In the back of my mind,
At the bottom of my heart,
And at the tip of my tongue.
But I fight it hard!
I keep it locked away in my mind!
I keep it weighted down at the bottom of the sea
That is my heart.
And at the tip of my tongue it shall stay.
It shall never be released!
She gives me
Once she does it shall open doors and unlock feelings,
Passions I never knew I had.
She holds the secrets of my life in her precious hands.
For when you fight so hard for control of a girl,
You find that the only way you win
Is to lose control of it all.
So I gave her the key and now
Here I stand with nothing
And I find that
In lieu of power
There is happiness that no one can take.
Unless she fades away.
And so I hope, if she does,
That she returns the key so that there will be no hole
And I can have
Though it be a fleeting thing that comes and goes
I’d rather have that than if I have no Happiness
For she shall take it as she goes
From my life
Never to return
I hope and pray to that nonexistent god
That she will never fade away
Because while may not be love,
It is something close.