Why I No Longer Call You My Bestfriend

October 18, 2012
By Anonymous

Are the emotions you felt
I didn't explain why
Cause it hurt too much
It took me 3 years to realize
Our friendship was a scam
I stuck by your side through thick and thin
I gave you advise
I hugged you when you cried
I lied for you so you could do what you wanted
I got in trouble for you
I told you my secrets
I helped you apply for your first job
I wrote down exactly what you should say
I gave you confidence when you were feeling blue
Whether it was about your freckles
Or the ways boys treated you
I listened to your stories about your flings
I listened to your stories about trying new things
I tried to pull you in the right direction
But you hardly listened to me
All the while
I was in great pain
I showed up to school with new scars everyday
I tried to hide them best I could
But people always find the things you are trying to hide
People I never talked to before in my life tried to comfort me
Yet my best friend didn't even notice my self-harm
I know you cared about me
But with you it was always about “me me me”
You never really paid attention to me
You listened but you never heard me
Then you went back to your old ways
Hooking up with people only for their looks
Never caring who you hurt
You broke a boy’s heart
And you didn't think twice
Then I heard from friends
About things you supposedly said
I didn't listen to them
After all You were my best friend
Best friends don’t constantly talk s*** behind the other one’s back
But you did
Even to my boyfriend
You thought he agreed to what you said
You thought you two were friends
Too bad the truth is he lied to you instead
Because he knew he couldn't trust you with the truth
You told me what he said without any emotion
Though I know If I were telling you the same
I would be hugging you saying
“You didn't deserve that.”
And “How could he do that to you?”
All I got was a “She was more beautiful than you.”
I acted as if I didn't care
On the inside I was extremely hurt
You of all people should have comforted me
You should have known what he did what tear me apart
But like always all you wanted to focus on was you
All you wanted to talk about was your new fling
The parties you went to and what you two did
So after all these infractions
I grew apart from you
I couldn't deal with your games anymore
I couldn't deal with your deceitfulness anymore
I couldn't deal with you anymore
So I left you without saying a reason
And sure enough
You blew it out of proportion
Making it seem like I was in fact
The bad guy
Like I was the conceited one
Like I was the one who was never a true friend
Of course since you were kinda popular
People believed you
No one but my true friends asked for my side of the story
So I guess I should thank you
Because you rooted out my fake friends
I tried to help you with the same thing
I warned you some of your friends weren't true
I wanted you to know
Since I knew what it felt like to be betrayed
But you wouldn't believe me
You insisted I was crazy
Yet till this day your so called friends
Still talk s*** about you
Behind your back
You may think I am lying
That I am falsely advertising
But the truth is the truth is the truth
So hopefully one day you’ll believe me
Before you find out the hard way
Like I did with you

The author's comments:
This is a poem to my ex best friend.

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