Demoralized | Teen Ink

Demoralized

September 27, 2012
By AlvinEN BRONZE, Oak Park, Michigan
AlvinEN BRONZE, Oak Park, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Sitting here in the dark
‘is anybody there” I would mutter.
Chills run up and down my back.
Cold winds breezing through me
like a tornado in the forest. My heart,
it stops every ten seconds, hoping
it never catches me.
It follows me
but where.
Where is it.
A shadow coming closer
And closer.
My heart slowing down to every inch.
I hear it next to me
but the silence is daunting.
Taunting me.
Haunting me.
All of a sudden,
like a rain drop out of the sky
voices shatter through the unforgiven halls.
I Seeeeee Youuuuu .
Each time like a crescendo
in a mens chorus.
two steps forward.
My heart delayed,
decelerating as the room fills with silence
again.
I start to rise
I see a little boy,
paralyzed, frozen,
terrorized in terror.
He lies there unmovable.
Why doesn’t he move?
“hello”
I would whisper.
Under no control of my body,
I would motion towards him,
deliberately gazing at him.
I’m out of breath
Rising
Higher and Higher until…
I’m gone.
I realized, that
That little boy was once me
Why couldn’t anyone save me


The author's comments:
Statement
This poem has changed much over time except a few punctuations. In the revising stage, I got lots of feedback that the diction and the syntax was great. Most of the changes was based on punctuation and spellings. A few line breaks here and there but other than that it was fine. The decisions I made in the final draft was to put in more commas and line breaks to emphasis the meaning and the power of the sentence.
The meaning of this poem is based on depression. The poem is about that moment in my life where I’m depressed because of so much stress. In the poem it talks about how I’m in a nightmare, scared out of my mind to the point where I died. My spiritual self is looking at my physical self in pity and sorrow.

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