Broken Back Broken Heart

September 15, 2012
By Intrepidnzx GOLD, East Syracuse, New York
Intrepidnzx GOLD, East Syracuse, New York
14 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
“A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.”
― John Lennon


Broken back black eyes
Heart ache no surprise
Days end
No friends

Broken heart
Torn apart
Fake smile
That'll stay a while

Loved girl
She knows it’s her world
lookin' at her subjects
Livin' life with no regrets.

Broken back
Broken heart
So small things
To tear apart

My life
Killed strife
Happy lives
Lovely eyes

It’s different now
I know how
To be me now..



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This article has 4 comments.


on Mar. 29 2013 at 10:46 pm
Intrepidnzx GOLD, East Syracuse, New York
14 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
“A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.”
― John Lennon

you didnt even try to anylize it nor think about it. it is an obviouse poem teh most simple minded could figure out what it means

Hannabug GOLD said...
on Sep. 24 2012 at 9:14 pm
Hannabug GOLD, Winona, Minnesota
10 articles 0 photos 141 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't only practice your art, but force your way into its secrets, for it and knowledge can raise men to the Divine." Ludwig van Beethoven

Hey this is a very good poem :) 

on Sep. 22 2012 at 6:14 pm
Intrepidnzx GOLD, East Syracuse, New York
14 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
“A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.”
― John Lennon

it is supposed to mean that at first i tried to be me and no one liked it then i tried to be popular then everyone besides me liked it... but i decided to go back to me and i knwo how to be okay with that now...

DeleteMe said...
on Sep. 19 2012 at 3:09 am
DeleteMe, Nampa, Idaho
0 articles 0 photos 36 comments
Interesting. I like the rhyme scheme, but I'm not crazy about the poem as a whole. I feel like the words and their meanings don't flow well together, like you just smacked down a paper onto a table, grabbed a pencil, and said, "I'm gonna rhyme some sad words and some happy words and it's gonna seem deep and melodramatic!" but then it kinda fell flat. Don't take that personally or too seriously. I honestly like the concept of this poem, I think it has promise, and I like where you're going with your style as a poet, but I think it needs some work. Otherwise, you did a pretty good job. I'd say 3/5. :)


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