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River

River
Have you ever had the wish,
Almost like the fish,
That you are not captured
To only be devoured
By what seems to be the jaws
Chomping down on our flaws,
Waiting,
Only to be found contemplating,
In this world.



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GonzaloTovilla said...
today at 9:22 pm:
Pretty good poem. I like the flow. The flow is gold.
 
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TARDISdriverThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Nov. 26, 2012 at 9:36 pm:
I like writing that makes you think. Yours certainly did that.
 
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spudbud This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 26, 2012 at 7:07 pm:

 I LOVE THIS. You've really painted a picture in my head, and given me something to think about.

 If I may, I would like to add my thoughts onto what you wrote.

It's interesting that you use fish to represent people. We are all swimming in the same ocean, and we are all fish. Sure, we all have our differences, and not every fish is "perfect."

 And then comes along society, rudely scooping us out of the ocean, singling us out, and trying to make is fit in to... (more »)

 
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AustinTakodaKiryu said...
Jul. 26, 2012 at 4:07 pm:
it was fine.i liked it.jst a lil more work.kk?:)
 
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TraceS. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 26, 2012 at 12:36 am:
I do like this, the only problem is that it is too short! A lengthier version, perhaps?
 
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caitiekate said...
Jul. 25, 2012 at 3:28 pm:
bella, i love that poem!!! it's short and sweet, but really well written!!! i hope you continue to post more of your work (: my poems are a bit longer, but i would love to have you check them out!!
 
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albinotiger said...
Jul. 22, 2012 at 2:59 pm:
Whoa that poem is so powerful! Great work 5 stars! (maybe check out my work sometime)
 
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