Welcoming Darkness

July 3, 2012
Cant do this anymore. The medicine doesn't work,so I stopped taking it. Whats the point anyway? Its supposed to make me feel better? Make me feel happier and calmer? No, the only thing that helps me feel better are the little cuts and scars scattered across my body. This mental abuse that I've been receiving is becoming too much to take. They may not realize bu each harsh word no matter how small it may be, kills me a little more inside. Honestly I don't care anymore. In fact, I welcome it. The darkness is overpowering me, and it don't bother me.Whats the point in trying to stay in the light? Why not just give up? I'm consumed by it.I'm already dead inside. Death doesn't scare me. I think it would just be better for everyone, including myself if I wasn't here anyway. I just cant live in this world. If that's what you can even call it,world. More like hell. I'm done, I cant handle this treatment. It like I'm stuck inside a mental institution. My mother says I need help. No I don't. I don't need help nor want it. I'm done trying to be something I'm not, I'm done acting happy, when in reality, I'm dying. I welcome the darkness.
I love you mom and dad. But this is goodbye.. I'm already gone, forgotten, trapped inside the darkness...

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