The Way I Really Feel

A smile...
A laugh...
Is a mask over my inner misery...
They can't tell by looking at me,
But inside I'm falling apart.
I can't stand another day of this woe.
Standing in the reflection of my doubts,
My faith is running low.
My hands are slipping off the rope.
It's all so surreal...
I feel that this can't be happening,
That reality is all just a dream.
Forever lost in what I used to be
This is not my true being
I know this can't be all there is...
Has not God planned for me so much more?
Praying desperately for relief
I bow my head
Begging for a change,
An end to this horror.
Nobody can see
My true feelings.
For I cover them up with false joy...
And allow fake emotion to pass through.
I'm sick of holding this in.





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